The Big 3-0

Up until a few months ago, the prospect of turning thirty did not phase me one bit. But the closer the day comes (March 21), the more I start to dread it. I promise, I KNOW how silly it is. But for some reason, I see time just FLYING by once I’m thirty – as in, if I blink - my time will be up. Crazy, huh? People have always thought that I looked young for my age, so when I asked a lady the other day how old she thought I was (this was prefaced by her exclaiming “But you’re just a baby!”), and she said, “Oh…about thirty,” I thought I was going to die!! :)





I’ve also taken some time to reflect on how much I’ve grown in the past ten or so years. I am a completely different person than my younger self. At least I am in my own eyes. A lot of that change came from motherhood. In my earlier days, my scope of the world did not go much further than “me, myself, and I.”

Here are a list of some of the things I wish I had known ten + years ago.

1. I would have slowed down and enjoyed my childhood more. It seems like I was always looking forward to the next milestone.

2. I would have had a greater appreciation for the sacrifices my parents made to give me a good education and all of the other things they worked so hard to give me. I would have realized how easy I had it, and not been so selfish.

3. I would have worried less, and understood that not every problem was the “end of the world.”

4. I would have had greater confidence in who I was, instead of trying to be what I thought people wanted me to be. I would have understood that people just weren’t paying attention to me as much as I thought they were, and I would have been less easily embarrassed.

5. I would hold tight to those who lifted me up, and gently let go of those who brought me down.

6. I would have recognized that the guy who broke my heart was really a big dork (sorry, couldn’t think of a less corny word), and that someone 100 times better would be coming along. I would have moved on a lot faster.

7. I would be much less naïve, and have stronger conviction in the things I had to say.

8. I would acknowledge the fact that you can be “heard”, without being loud and attention-seeking. People listen more when you speak softly and less often.

9. I would enjoy the simple things in life. And I mean simple.


Even though it would have been nice to know all of these things back then, I realize that the small setbacks and heartbreaks are what helped shape my character today. It was imperative that I go through them so that I might be a stronger, self-aware 30-year old.


I look forward to the next ten years. I pray that God will bring me closer into my relationship with him. That I will welcome more challenges, understanding that they are his way of developing me into the Christian woman that he desires me to be. I pray that I will help my children through the same experiences that I had, and that I will influence them to look to Him for guidance and support during tough times. I understand that no matter how OLD you are, God wants us to live each day to HIS fullest. As if it were our last. Not in worry, but in glorification of his word.


I might still sulk for a little while, but I will get over it! :)